She was blond. She was cute. And I was a bit sweet on her. We didn't know each other real well. I had just moved to town the summer before.
I was pushing hard for a 4.0 senior year. I was a National Merit Scholarship finalist, somewhat of an anomaly in Guthrie, Oklahoma. Looking back now, I wonder if the little blonde welcomed my attention because she hoped I would be able to help improve her grade point.
One day we were standing in the hall between classes, leaning against a row of student lockers. She looked at me, batted those long eyelashes and asked me what I planned to do with my life.
"I'm going to be a missionary," I said.
A look of horror crossed her face. "Oh, Howard," she groaned, "don't throw your life away."
It stunned me. The two of us were evidently marching to the beat of different drummers. That day our paths began to separate. We were looking for different things in life.
There's some evidence, of course, that little blonde was right. Sadly, in measuring success, those in the world and those in the church sometimes use strikingly similar yardsticks:
By such standard gauges of success I've fallen short.Measured by these scales, I've wasted some natural abilities. Some might even say that I've thrown my life away.
Remember those charts high school counselors showed us proving how much more we would earn over a lifetime if we finished college? They showed even more income for a master's degree. For a doctorate it was really impressive. Notwithstanding all that, our family's annual base salary doesn't rank us very well on secular society's success charts.
Some church people, of course, put us up on a pedestal. I occasionally meet some dear saint who just wants to "touch the missionary." Still, a lot of Christians consider us missionaries to be dated, stodgy and out-of-touch. Perhaps with good reason. When we showed up back in the USA on home assignment, I only had one or two suits. The shoes I wore one year were one size too large. I couldn't take them back to the store to exchange them because someone gave them to me rather than taking them to Goodwill.
We were often blissfully unaware of the latest American fads and fashions. We didn't know the names of the hottest screen stars. We probably hadn't read the latest best-seller . . .at least in English. Many of the things that matter to us seem to matter little to most monocultural, monolingual Americans. People were sometimes a little uncomfortable around us. It almost seemed like we had become foreigners in our homeland. We just didn't fit in.
Thrown my life away? It might seem so. Yet, I'm here today to tell you that I don't feel that way. If the Lord endowed me with particular talents and abilities He did so for Kingdom reasons. He knew where He wanted me to use them in Kingdom business. That's what I've tried to do.
Over the years I've been bewildered by the conflicting signals and orders that can come from within an organization. I've been disturbed by injustices befalling others as well as myself. I've been discouraged at meager results in post-Christian Europe. When few in the homeland seemed to care I've felt very discouraged. Midst the poverty of Haiti, I've felt overwhelmed. But I've never had the feeling that I'd thrown my life away. Never. [ e-book on Haiti ]
Instead, I was often reassured that we were involved in the most momentous enterprise of all time: the completion of the task of world evangelism.
Now: what about you? What are you doing with the mix of gifts and talents God gave you? What are your priorities in the use of your God-given talents and abilities? God has given you creative intellectual gifts. That you are a member of Phi Delta Lambda is evidence of that. Where are you investing those God-given abilities? Have you put them to work almost exclusively in your own career, in seeking that elusive thing called success? Is your involvement in global evangelism basically a small monetary one, a kindly gesture, "give a little for a good cause"? Is world missions for you just one more good thing that Christians ought to be doing?
I hop you'll be different. I'd like to challenge you to apply the best you can offer to help carry out the Great Commission. Let the Holy Spirit help you begin seeing the world as God sees it. Kingdom work demands the best and the brightest. You're one of those. The Kingdom needs your help.
Down through the years, the world missions thrust has had some of the best minds involved in cross-cultural gospel witness. In the heyday of Jesuit missionary outreach some of the best minds in Europe went out as missionaries, men like Matteo Ricci and Ramon Lull.
Today, there are still about two billion people who are outside the gospel witness. That's an immense number. It need not, however, overwhelm us. Those two billion are in about 5,000 people groups yet to have a church planted in their midst. They live "where the church is not yet." To carry out the Great Commission, we need to establish a beachhead for the Gospel in those 5,000 people groups. Our own goal as Nazarene missionaries is that every person will soon be able to hear, understand, and receive the good news from a holiness group among his or her own people. [ more on the unreached ]
Unfortunately, our church has hit a plateau in missions giving and sending. By careful use of limited resources we've been able to continue entering new countries. However, the number of active Nazarene missionaries has been stalled near the 600 level for several years. After adjustments for inflation, missions giving has not risen much in recent years. If we are to regain momentum, carry out our divine mandate for spreading the message of scriptural holiness around the world, we face some momentous problems that call for the best.
Let me plead with you today to apply yourself to solving problems of:
Please help us solve these pressing problems. Help unleash the explosive potential in our churches. Without your creative gifts we may not be able to carry out Christ's Great Commission. Years ago, a cute little blonde thought I was throwing my life away. I don't remember her name. I do, however, remember that Jesus once said that those who try to save or make secure their lives will lose them (Matthew 16:25 and Luke 17:33). Only those who lose their live will keep it.
Thrown my life away? Yes, I've done that. And I found it again.
Will you join me?
Given at an annual Southern Nazarene University Phi Delta Lambda Honor Society alumni breakfast
-- Howard Culbertson,
What I want my legacy to be Our first nine months as missionaries Where they did not belong 10/40 Window explanation and map Seeking God's will? African martyr's commitment Mission trip fundraising Ten ways to ruin your mission trip Nazarene Missions International resources